Fall/Winter Yoga Class
Schedule 2007/08
at Northampton Athletic Club
www.nohoac.com
Tuesday 6:45 - 7:45 a.m. Hatha Mixed Level
Wednesday 6:50 - 8:20 p.m. Hatha Mixed Level
Thursday Noon - 1:oo p.m. Hatha Mixed Level
Sunday 10:30 - Noon Gentle/Restorative
For more information about my classes or private sessions visit my website at http://www.pranaheals.com/
To receive my quarterly newsletter, "Lessons on Yoga", write me at info@pranaheals.com
Friday, November 09, 2007
Peaceful and Alive
With the unseasonably warm weather and lots of socializing during the peak foliage season and Halloween, my body is open, receiving and flowing in the pranic energy that is being generated internally and externally. Despite the warm weather, I notice my body is also craving soups rather that salads…still preparing for winter…turning inward.
In the asana practice, we seem to be coming into balance…backbends becoming smaller, gently warming into forward bends. Our movement has slowed down after a faster paced summer and fall.
We are bringing the internal environment into balance with alternate nostril breathing, three part breathing and longer meditations….calming the internal environment and the mind…“Give the mind a rest.”, you will often hear me suggest in my classes.
And of course, balancing poses can aid in this process, so we continue to balance in each class. Lately, we have been playing in, or preparing for, headstands and supported handstands…shifting moods, attitudes and reversing the flow of fluids within the body.
I also find twists to be very helpful this time of year. When we shut the windows and turn on the heat in our homes and cars, we significantly increase the concentration of indoor air pollution from household products, dust, and allergens. Twists can help to squeeze these toxins out of the organs, to the kidneys and skin for elimination. Irritability can rise as the body detoxes. Twists, a hot bath followed by a cool shower, or regular saunas can also aid in the natural cleansing process.
On those cooler nights and mornings, we are adding some warming pranyama, like Lions Breath or Kapalbhati Breathing. Heating up the internal environment and raising energy. Lions Breath can also provide an emotional release for the irritability that can arise when the body is eliminating toxins. Nothing like three good growls to shift your mood.
Take time to rest and enjoy the harvest of your summer and fall efforts. Take in the colors, smells and as much fresh air as possible with brisk walks, hikes or bike rides. Enjoy the breaks as much as the exertion by eating warming foods, while spending time with friends and family who support who you truly are.
How can you bring your body more into balance in your daily life with twists, heat, rest, cleansing and exercise? I invite you to bring more peace and aliveness into your day.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
On a Personal Note
My husband, Rene and I did a 5 year recommitment ceremony during peak fall foliage, October 22, 2007. I am still feeling the prana from the energy that we raised.
We conducted a private co-created ceremony under a big orange maple tree at the Japanese Tea House at Smith College. We walked, moved and glided through orange leaves as we raised energy around us and within us. We listened to sacred chants and songs, shared our desires for support and affirmed that support in creating our most precious dreams of health, travel, family and bliss.
Many having been asking about my health. I have been guided not to write about it anymore, so that is why you haven’t heard much in this forum. I am in a maintenance phase of my healing. My body sends clear messages as to what is needed. I listen and act accordingly. I feel strong and healthy when I am living my Truth. I thank you for your concern and ongoing support.
CD Release
Self Love is in its final stages of completion. Currently, the plan is to submit samples of the CD to be signed with a recording company. Once I hear back, the CD will be released, first in a format that can be purchased and downloaded off my website. Soon thereafter, it will be available on CD. Preordering is still encouraged to expedite CD production.
With the unseasonably warm weather and lots of socializing during the peak foliage season and Halloween, my body is open, receiving and flowing in the pranic energy that is being generated internally and externally. Despite the warm weather, I notice my body is also craving soups rather that salads…still preparing for winter…turning inward.
In the asana practice, we seem to be coming into balance…backbends becoming smaller, gently warming into forward bends. Our movement has slowed down after a faster paced summer and fall.
We are bringing the internal environment into balance with alternate nostril breathing, three part breathing and longer meditations….calming the internal environment and the mind…“Give the mind a rest.”, you will often hear me suggest in my classes.
And of course, balancing poses can aid in this process, so we continue to balance in each class. Lately, we have been playing in, or preparing for, headstands and supported handstands…shifting moods, attitudes and reversing the flow of fluids within the body.
I also find twists to be very helpful this time of year. When we shut the windows and turn on the heat in our homes and cars, we significantly increase the concentration of indoor air pollution from household products, dust, and allergens. Twists can help to squeeze these toxins out of the organs, to the kidneys and skin for elimination. Irritability can rise as the body detoxes. Twists, a hot bath followed by a cool shower, or regular saunas can also aid in the natural cleansing process.
On those cooler nights and mornings, we are adding some warming pranyama, like Lions Breath or Kapalbhati Breathing. Heating up the internal environment and raising energy. Lions Breath can also provide an emotional release for the irritability that can arise when the body is eliminating toxins. Nothing like three good growls to shift your mood.
Take time to rest and enjoy the harvest of your summer and fall efforts. Take in the colors, smells and as much fresh air as possible with brisk walks, hikes or bike rides. Enjoy the breaks as much as the exertion by eating warming foods, while spending time with friends and family who support who you truly are.
How can you bring your body more into balance in your daily life with twists, heat, rest, cleansing and exercise? I invite you to bring more peace and aliveness into your day.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
On a Personal Note
My husband, Rene and I did a 5 year recommitment ceremony during peak fall foliage, October 22, 2007. I am still feeling the prana from the energy that we raised.
We conducted a private co-created ceremony under a big orange maple tree at the Japanese Tea House at Smith College. We walked, moved and glided through orange leaves as we raised energy around us and within us. We listened to sacred chants and songs, shared our desires for support and affirmed that support in creating our most precious dreams of health, travel, family and bliss.
Many having been asking about my health. I have been guided not to write about it anymore, so that is why you haven’t heard much in this forum. I am in a maintenance phase of my healing. My body sends clear messages as to what is needed. I listen and act accordingly. I feel strong and healthy when I am living my Truth. I thank you for your concern and ongoing support.
CD Release
Self Love is in its final stages of completion. Currently, the plan is to submit samples of the CD to be signed with a recording company. Once I hear back, the CD will be released, first in a format that can be purchased and downloaded off my website. Soon thereafter, it will be available on CD. Preordering is still encouraged to expedite CD production.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Brief Health Update
I chose not to provide a health update in my newsletter b/c I feel I am moving beyond the breast cancer into being cancer free and maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
I took a very powerful healing retreat to Harbin Hot Springs Heart Consciousness Church where I soaked in the healing water daily, received the yoga and weekly transformational Amanae sessions with my teacher Gita (Satya Marga). I also did a session of hypnomassage, which I also found very informative and healing.
I chose to spend about 2 1/2 weeks in silence in this very social place to learn to maintain my energetic boundries. I lived in nature for two weeks, camping. Animal teachers came to me almost every day. I felt blessed to experience not only the power and wisdom of wild animals, but my main teachers have become domestic cats. There is really no way to briefly articulate all I experienced. Some day, I will write the book. Right now, I feel that much of my reserves need to go into me and when I have a good deal of surplus, that energy will go into teaching how one can heal naturally through personal transformation. The best way to receive these teaching from me right now is to come to my classes and work with me privately. B/c of my transformation and ever increasing clairvoyance, I have reached new heights in my teaching and private work. I welcome you to explore the yoga and teachings with me.
As I move deeper into knowing what serves me and become more and more connected to my Source...my Truth and how that Truth informs my daily life, the cancer becomes less present in my body. I have been living with a "lump" (inflammation) that increases and decreases in size daily for about 2 months. The fluctuation has been a direct result of whether I am living my Truth or not. The effects of diet, sleep and treatments have been secondary. The "lump" has finally dissolved and all I feel is scare tissue where the lumpectomy surgery took place.
To be sure I am being "responsible" and ensuring the cancer is cleared, I continue Iscador injections and have begun a new treatment of Vitamin C IVs with Latrile. After my first IV, the lump completely dissolved, so I am making this preventative investment.
I continue to take all my cancer killing supplements, eat an alkalizing diet, exercise, do daily yoga, prayer, meditation, visualizations, chi gong and mostly, live my Truth and Bliss every moment. I have taken many risks and have been held by the Universe with each step I take toward my Truth.
It has been quite a ride. I am grateful and feeling all the benefits of the gift of breast cancer.
My journey has not been an easy one and every individual must take their own path to healing. This has been my chosen path and what has worked for me.
Thank you for your ongoing support and concern for my well being. Most of all thank you for honoring my chosen path to healing.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
www.pranaheals.com
I chose not to provide a health update in my newsletter b/c I feel I am moving beyond the breast cancer into being cancer free and maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
I took a very powerful healing retreat to Harbin Hot Springs Heart Consciousness Church where I soaked in the healing water daily, received the yoga and weekly transformational Amanae sessions with my teacher Gita (Satya Marga). I also did a session of hypnomassage, which I also found very informative and healing.
I chose to spend about 2 1/2 weeks in silence in this very social place to learn to maintain my energetic boundries. I lived in nature for two weeks, camping. Animal teachers came to me almost every day. I felt blessed to experience not only the power and wisdom of wild animals, but my main teachers have become domestic cats. There is really no way to briefly articulate all I experienced. Some day, I will write the book. Right now, I feel that much of my reserves need to go into me and when I have a good deal of surplus, that energy will go into teaching how one can heal naturally through personal transformation. The best way to receive these teaching from me right now is to come to my classes and work with me privately. B/c of my transformation and ever increasing clairvoyance, I have reached new heights in my teaching and private work. I welcome you to explore the yoga and teachings with me.
As I move deeper into knowing what serves me and become more and more connected to my Source...my Truth and how that Truth informs my daily life, the cancer becomes less present in my body. I have been living with a "lump" (inflammation) that increases and decreases in size daily for about 2 months. The fluctuation has been a direct result of whether I am living my Truth or not. The effects of diet, sleep and treatments have been secondary. The "lump" has finally dissolved and all I feel is scare tissue where the lumpectomy surgery took place.
To be sure I am being "responsible" and ensuring the cancer is cleared, I continue Iscador injections and have begun a new treatment of Vitamin C IVs with Latrile. After my first IV, the lump completely dissolved, so I am making this preventative investment.
I continue to take all my cancer killing supplements, eat an alkalizing diet, exercise, do daily yoga, prayer, meditation, visualizations, chi gong and mostly, live my Truth and Bliss every moment. I have taken many risks and have been held by the Universe with each step I take toward my Truth.
It has been quite a ride. I am grateful and feeling all the benefits of the gift of breast cancer.
My journey has not been an easy one and every individual must take their own path to healing. This has been my chosen path and what has worked for me.
Thank you for your ongoing support and concern for my well being. Most of all thank you for honoring my chosen path to healing.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
www.pranaheals.com
Summer Yoga with Prana
“Join our diverse yoga community at Northampton Athletic Club (NAC)
as a day guest or member”
Visit www.nohoac.com
I will list my schedule below for your convenience…
Tuesday6:45 - 7:45 a.m.
Wednesday6:50 - 8:20 p.m.
ThursdayNoon - 1:15 p.m.
Wednesday6:50 - 8:20 p.m.
ThursdayNoon - 1:15 p.m.
New CD Project
Self Love...with Prana
Yoga for Relaxation: A Guided Visualization and Gentle and Restorative Asana Flows
Double CD with Photos of Poses
Support Production by Preordering Today
Introductory Offer$22.00
(CDs will be available by end of August)
Order by sending a check payable to:Regina Barrett, P.O. Box 217, Conway, MA 01341
Opening and Expanding into Summer
After a long rainy spring here in western MA we took one more deep dive inward to evaluate our intentions and assess our direction before moving, with intention, into high summer.
Last week, as the rains fell upon us and locked us in humidity, we used this warmth and dampness to go deep into the hips. Another opportunity to release the old patterns and move into life in a new way.
Now that the sun is upon us and we are feeling summer, we will slowly begin to open and prepare the spine for back bends. I also invite you to use the energy and flexibility that warm weather offers to bring your yoga to a new level.
We are also beginning to lubricate the vocal cords with throat openers and sounding, while gently expanding the heart center and ribs. As the heart center opens, along with the throat, we can move into our summer intentions with clear and honest communication.
As we become more active and productive, we can remain grounded by practicing poses such as lunge, warrior and deep squats.
Strengthening the core allows us to maintain our intentions as life becomes busier. Continuing to sink deeply into Self, as we spin off into a social and active summer. A daily meditation practice can support any need for clarity and focus.
I encourage you to enjoy the relaxation that this time of year offers. Also, use your strong centered loving yoga voice to say "no, thank you” to those social engagements that don’t serve your highest good and the highest good of all. Practice discerning what serves Self in each moment. What is it that nourishes your soul? How would your precious and sacred moments best serve Self? The Highest, most blissful You.
I look forward to practicing with you and sharing the yoga.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
http://www.pranaheals.com
After a long rainy spring here in western MA we took one more deep dive inward to evaluate our intentions and assess our direction before moving, with intention, into high summer.
Last week, as the rains fell upon us and locked us in humidity, we used this warmth and dampness to go deep into the hips. Another opportunity to release the old patterns and move into life in a new way.
Now that the sun is upon us and we are feeling summer, we will slowly begin to open and prepare the spine for back bends. I also invite you to use the energy and flexibility that warm weather offers to bring your yoga to a new level.
We are also beginning to lubricate the vocal cords with throat openers and sounding, while gently expanding the heart center and ribs. As the heart center opens, along with the throat, we can move into our summer intentions with clear and honest communication.
As we become more active and productive, we can remain grounded by practicing poses such as lunge, warrior and deep squats.
Strengthening the core allows us to maintain our intentions as life becomes busier. Continuing to sink deeply into Self, as we spin off into a social and active summer. A daily meditation practice can support any need for clarity and focus.
I encourage you to enjoy the relaxation that this time of year offers. Also, use your strong centered loving yoga voice to say "no, thank you” to those social engagements that don’t serve your highest good and the highest good of all. Practice discerning what serves Self in each moment. What is it that nourishes your soul? How would your precious and sacred moments best serve Self? The Highest, most blissful You.
I look forward to practicing with you and sharing the yoga.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
http://www.pranaheals.com
Monday, April 16, 2007
My sub list for my medical leave beginning April 23rd and ending June 4th
Sundays 10:30 - Noon Restorative Class is canceled for the summer. The following workshops will be offered in it's place...
April 29th Twisting into Spring with Rosalie
May 12th Backbends with Michael C.
Tuesdays 6:45 - 7:45 a.m. Mixed Level Hatha Leslie (Rosalie for May 29th)
Wednesdays 6:50 -8:20 p.m. Mixed Level Hatha Michael T.
Thursdays Noon - 1:15 p.m. Chakra Yoga Ellie
Thursdays 4:15 - 5:15 p.m. Canceled for summer
I'll miss sharing the yoga with you. Please continue to practice the yoga while I am away.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
Sundays 10:30 - Noon Restorative Class is canceled for the summer. The following workshops will be offered in it's place...
April 29th Twisting into Spring with Rosalie
May 12th Backbends with Michael C.
Tuesdays 6:45 - 7:45 a.m. Mixed Level Hatha Leslie (Rosalie for May 29th)
Wednesdays 6:50 -8:20 p.m. Mixed Level Hatha Michael T.
Thursdays Noon - 1:15 p.m. Chakra Yoga Ellie
Thursdays 4:15 - 5:15 p.m. Canceled for summer
I'll miss sharing the yoga with you. Please continue to practice the yoga while I am away.
Namaste. Jai Ma!
Prana
Dear Inner Circle,
How are you?
I am writing b/c many of you have heard of my decision to not move forward with the surgery (mastectomy). I am experiencing some acceptance by those who get me and a lot of concern, sadness and anger from others. I feel the need to bring my community into alignment with my choice b/c your thoughts and conversations effect my healing process.
I want you to know that I was more than willing to let go of my breast. I was excited for the reconstruction. I have a wonderful team of MDs and practitioners supporting me. However, as the surgery approached, I was bombarded with many surprises about my treatment plan. It required way too much compromises and helped me to realize that going this route is absolutely not my Truth. It is not what I believe will heal me. I have always believed that this path was more destructive than healing. It has been too much of a paradigm shift to make in less than a month. I need a gentler path. One that includes spirituality and natural methods. At this stage, I am not willing to subject myself to nuclear medicine and radiation. I already feel I have moved further down this path than was in my comfort zone. I did so, b/c of outside influences and b/c of my own fear.
My faith in my own ability to heal myself has been restored b/c big miracles have happened in my life in the past week or so. Some day I will write a book about the multitude of miracles that have transpired this year. It is too extensive to write in one e mail and those who have not experienced such miracles in their lives may be skeptical. I do not want that energy in my field.
Medically, my oncologist has informed me that the cancer on the margins of the biopsy were contained in tumors and not running wild (invasive). The invasive cancer was removed. When I check in with my breast and my body, I feel my ability to heal. My medical intuitive, who cleared her breast cancer with very little natural or western medical intervention, also agrees and is assisting me. Much has passed over the past year that has moved me from a state of fear and loneliness to a state of health, confidence and trust. I am completely content being with myself and my guides. I am being fully supported by the Universe.
So I ask you to visualize with me that I CAN DO IT! I have healthy, cancer free breasts and I am being fully supported on my path to clear the cancer. The cancer is cleared NOW.
Set all your doubts and worries aside and join me in this powerful affirmation of my ability to self heal.
I have my own ability to monitor the cancer. Trust that I do. Please do not ask me to be monitored medically. Every additional mammogram or biospy just aggravates my body and breast. It is not productive.
I am off to Harbin for an extended retreat with no return date. I will stay for as long as I need to. I will know when it is time to return. I need to isolate myself from others feelings/concerns. I look forward to being one with nature, being surrounded by light beings and doing yoga that serves my healing.
I will see you when I return. My medical leave is 6 weeks. In that past, a few weeks at Harbin was more than enough. We'll see what this trip brings.
Happy Spring! Happy May!
I love you all SOOOO much!
Prana
How are you?
I am writing b/c many of you have heard of my decision to not move forward with the surgery (mastectomy). I am experiencing some acceptance by those who get me and a lot of concern, sadness and anger from others. I feel the need to bring my community into alignment with my choice b/c your thoughts and conversations effect my healing process.
I want you to know that I was more than willing to let go of my breast. I was excited for the reconstruction. I have a wonderful team of MDs and practitioners supporting me. However, as the surgery approached, I was bombarded with many surprises about my treatment plan. It required way too much compromises and helped me to realize that going this route is absolutely not my Truth. It is not what I believe will heal me. I have always believed that this path was more destructive than healing. It has been too much of a paradigm shift to make in less than a month. I need a gentler path. One that includes spirituality and natural methods. At this stage, I am not willing to subject myself to nuclear medicine and radiation. I already feel I have moved further down this path than was in my comfort zone. I did so, b/c of outside influences and b/c of my own fear.
My faith in my own ability to heal myself has been restored b/c big miracles have happened in my life in the past week or so. Some day I will write a book about the multitude of miracles that have transpired this year. It is too extensive to write in one e mail and those who have not experienced such miracles in their lives may be skeptical. I do not want that energy in my field.
Medically, my oncologist has informed me that the cancer on the margins of the biopsy were contained in tumors and not running wild (invasive). The invasive cancer was removed. When I check in with my breast and my body, I feel my ability to heal. My medical intuitive, who cleared her breast cancer with very little natural or western medical intervention, also agrees and is assisting me. Much has passed over the past year that has moved me from a state of fear and loneliness to a state of health, confidence and trust. I am completely content being with myself and my guides. I am being fully supported by the Universe.
So I ask you to visualize with me that I CAN DO IT! I have healthy, cancer free breasts and I am being fully supported on my path to clear the cancer. The cancer is cleared NOW.
Set all your doubts and worries aside and join me in this powerful affirmation of my ability to self heal.
I have my own ability to monitor the cancer. Trust that I do. Please do not ask me to be monitored medically. Every additional mammogram or biospy just aggravates my body and breast. It is not productive.
I am off to Harbin for an extended retreat with no return date. I will stay for as long as I need to. I will know when it is time to return. I need to isolate myself from others feelings/concerns. I look forward to being one with nature, being surrounded by light beings and doing yoga that serves my healing.
I will see you when I return. My medical leave is 6 weeks. In that past, a few weeks at Harbin was more than enough. We'll see what this trip brings.
Happy Spring! Happy May!
I love you all SOOOO much!
Prana
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
“Falling Back into Oneself” - Osho
Ignited by the longer days and spring energy rise, I have decided to share a bit of my winter yoga journey with you.
The winter, for me, has been a repetition of opportunities to play in “emptiness”. My breast cancer walk has turned out to be primarily a solo journey. Of course, many have contributed to my healing. I thank you all for the CDs, soups, reiki, prayers, support, gifts, cards and check ins. However, ultimately, I have been left with a great deal of alone time and healing to do on my own. An opportunity to “fall back into oneself”. I have continued to see it as a gift. It has allowed me to drop deeply into what my body needs to heal. I am taking each step with intention and consciousness. My breast is demanding this of me. Any miseating or stress causes my breast to inflame and the tumor to increase in size. When I listen and nurture my body, the breast calms down and the inflammation subsides.
So back to my lessons…there have been so many. I can not attempt to cover all of them in one article. Perhaps the book will follow some day. There have been many lessons around tribe. At first, I was bowled over by the support from my women friends. That lasted about a month. The holidays rushed in and everyone disappeared. Timing is everything. The lack of community and extended family support left me and my immediate family to bare the care and all that comes along with a cancer diagnosis. The financial and physical stress created a major strain on my primary relationship. I was left to handle much of my care, and manifestation of outside care, on my own. Yet, another opportunity to “fall back into oneself”.
My daily meditation practice kept me steady and sane during these moments of “hard times“. The yogic teaching helped me to understand the gifts available to me in this challenging and lonely time. Many moments of bliss and contentment were found on my cushion. The simplicity of this experience was profound.
After several months of struggle and finding my way through the madness that cancer can activate in a family, a community and ones mind, my earth angel home helper appeared. I hired her without the money to do so, trusting that if I took care of myself, I would be provided for. Very soon, the money appeared…just enough. Soon the financial support that was needed for the alternative medical care came through, but not until I received all the lessons I needed around manifestation and holding prosperity and abundance. There were also early lessons around asking for and receiving support. These lessons have been unfolding for several years, as I apply my spiritual practice, lifestyle and manifestation principles.
I am grateful to all my practitioners that worked on a promise for a few months. All the money for my care and support was manifested solely by me, while healing cancer. It was a stress I did not think I could endure, but was necessary. If one chooses, when one’s life is at stake, one finds resources. I am grateful to my partner Rene, who steadily kept our household expenses a float during this time. Without this support, things would have been much tougher. With will and desire, I was also been able to maintain my part time teaching schedule and a light load of private clients. Providing service/making a contribution has been essential for my healing. The regular asana yoga practice I share with my students gives me daily energy/life force/prana. Sharing yoga in a group always raises the energy/universal vibration in the Club. Overall, I find Northampton Athletic Club has very “clean” (healthy) clear energy. Come check it out some time. They have saunas!
Now that I am feeling fully provided for and have found the support I need within, I feel much lighter. My healing journey has really just begun. I learned a lot from my practitioners about lifestyle changes that I needed to make. I had no choice, but to walk my Truth in order to heal my breast. My breast has been speaking to me all along the way. The cancer has been a teacher in finding my way back to my pure essence…living my bliss, being healthy. And by being healthy, I mean feeling my cells alive and my energy high…thriving. Elena and Lenore’s nourishing cooking has helped tremendously in experiencing the healing gifts of food. I am also truly grateful to my teachers, Sylvia and Ariana and all my friends who offered sage advice around putting ME first…COMPLETELY loving Self. “Falling back into oneself” was a necessary step to come into the kind of self love that is needed to heal naturally.
I have had periods when life has been full, but a constant has been much alone time in a rural town this winter. Because I have limited energy to drive and visit others, I had no choice but to have “tea” with mySelf each and every day. I love to feel the bliss I feel when I am doing exactly what I love to do and what my body needs in each moment. It is pure ecstasy! My preference is to be in tribe, but I can also do this. I trust there is a lesson in it around being in tribe. When one is solid within oneself and unaffected by others, then one can be One with everything else. I felt that today on my walk. I felt the evenness…steadiness…of oneness…being neutral. My actions were not effecting anyone else. No one else was effecting me. I was at peace.
Always grateful to you for reading and for practicing the yoga.
Namaste.
Jai Ma!
Prana
www.pranaheals.com
Breast Cancer Update
For those who are concerned or curious, I will provide a brief health status update.
A year ago, I discover a marble sized breast lump. It has been a very stressful year and a half, which included three moves, two teaching location changes and an unsettled family environment. I can honestly say that I have done an excellent job changing my diet, exercising, self care, spiritual growth and getting the care I need. I received the best natural care in the Valley. However, cancer is cancer. It grows fast. A year later, the tumor is now 2 cm X 2 cm. Yoga teachers are famous for their small breasts, so this is a significant size for me.
I also grew tired of the daily awareness that every move I made or feeling I was having effected my breast and the size of the tumor. I was feeling held back from engaging fully in my life because of all the pressure to heal myself. I like to be out in the world enjoying life. I felt the need to take the pressure off and allow myself to have some sugar now and then, a glass of sake once in a while. To feel that I will be o.k. if I lose a few hours sleep here and there to stay up a little later.
As I hit this lifestyle maintenance wall, I decided to check in with my Oncologist.
She has been very supportive of my choices and took it upon herself to inquire about a “low impact” lumpectomy with local anesthesia and no radiation. She sent me to another surgeon for a second opinion who was also very supportive. I received the surgery yesterday at Cooley Dickinson Hospital. With prayers, support, a calming herbal tea and the medicine bhudda chant, I came through the procedure and am feeling pretty strong and only experiencing very minor pain.
Minimizing the chemicals (pain killers/anesthesia) in my body, prayer, choosing the right Dr., the 4 month detox lifestyle/diet and a week long vacation in Florida the week before the surgery must have all contributed to this surgery going much smoother than the previous. I also got to see an operating room and be awake during a surgery which most women do heavily sedated. It was scary, but also felt very empowering.
While in the hospital, it was difficult not to notice how much holistic health is missing from this health care setting. During the series of 6 mammograms necessary to locate the tumor, I could have really used a neck massage with some arnica. Instead, the radiologist stood in the space as we waited for the X Rays to develop, fumbling around nervously trying to spark up conversation to distract me. I chanted to myself and gazed at my beautiful medicine bhudda pendant through the discomfort of the neck pain and sore breast. It could have been so much more healing if she was willing to give a neck rub or offer something natural and healing for neck and the breast pain. Rescue remedy for the trauma. It also would have been beneficial to my healing and experience to be permitted to have a close friend or healer with me providing reiki, massage and natural remedies, holding my hand and chanting with me throughout the surgery.
The doctor and nurses did an excellent job. I accepted them as who they were, and in their own way, they all offered healing and love. They were all acting from their Highest Place for the Highest Good and were all performing at their Highest Potential. This was my prayer as I entered the surgery and it was how it turned out. There were moments when I felt held by the circle of women working on the surgery. It was a spiritual experience. As spiritual as we all felt comfortable being in front of each other. It was as if it was under the surface or instead, possibly the Universal Oneness of all of us practicing our own individual and collective spirituality and healing abilities. The medicine bhudda picture lying next to my head and my prayers and intentions may have created the vibe...safety and atmosphere for all to engage from their Highest place.
My husband, Rene, took the day off and we made an adventure of it. Staying in each moment fully and laughing most of the day. I felt good enough afterwards to get some plant medicine in the Smith College greenhouse by sitting in the tropical room and inhaling the fragrances and colors of the Bulb Show. What a great thing to do after day stay surgery.
I will know my pathology results in a few days. I began Iscador injections a month ago. I think this medicine is making me stronger as well. Iscador is a homeopathic remedy made from mistletoe. It has been studied for 15 years in Switzerland and is now commonly used as an alternative to radiation and chemo in Switzerland and Germany. Studies show that it is more effective. I will continue these injections and healthy living and monitor the cancer growth/presence with a mammogram in six to 12 months.
Thanks for your concern, thoughts, prayers and love. I am in good hands and feel stronger and healthier than ever.
Ignited by the longer days and spring energy rise, I have decided to share a bit of my winter yoga journey with you.
The winter, for me, has been a repetition of opportunities to play in “emptiness”. My breast cancer walk has turned out to be primarily a solo journey. Of course, many have contributed to my healing. I thank you all for the CDs, soups, reiki, prayers, support, gifts, cards and check ins. However, ultimately, I have been left with a great deal of alone time and healing to do on my own. An opportunity to “fall back into oneself”. I have continued to see it as a gift. It has allowed me to drop deeply into what my body needs to heal. I am taking each step with intention and consciousness. My breast is demanding this of me. Any miseating or stress causes my breast to inflame and the tumor to increase in size. When I listen and nurture my body, the breast calms down and the inflammation subsides.
So back to my lessons…there have been so many. I can not attempt to cover all of them in one article. Perhaps the book will follow some day. There have been many lessons around tribe. At first, I was bowled over by the support from my women friends. That lasted about a month. The holidays rushed in and everyone disappeared. Timing is everything. The lack of community and extended family support left me and my immediate family to bare the care and all that comes along with a cancer diagnosis. The financial and physical stress created a major strain on my primary relationship. I was left to handle much of my care, and manifestation of outside care, on my own. Yet, another opportunity to “fall back into oneself”.
My daily meditation practice kept me steady and sane during these moments of “hard times“. The yogic teaching helped me to understand the gifts available to me in this challenging and lonely time. Many moments of bliss and contentment were found on my cushion. The simplicity of this experience was profound.
After several months of struggle and finding my way through the madness that cancer can activate in a family, a community and ones mind, my earth angel home helper appeared. I hired her without the money to do so, trusting that if I took care of myself, I would be provided for. Very soon, the money appeared…just enough. Soon the financial support that was needed for the alternative medical care came through, but not until I received all the lessons I needed around manifestation and holding prosperity and abundance. There were also early lessons around asking for and receiving support. These lessons have been unfolding for several years, as I apply my spiritual practice, lifestyle and manifestation principles.
I am grateful to all my practitioners that worked on a promise for a few months. All the money for my care and support was manifested solely by me, while healing cancer. It was a stress I did not think I could endure, but was necessary. If one chooses, when one’s life is at stake, one finds resources. I am grateful to my partner Rene, who steadily kept our household expenses a float during this time. Without this support, things would have been much tougher. With will and desire, I was also been able to maintain my part time teaching schedule and a light load of private clients. Providing service/making a contribution has been essential for my healing. The regular asana yoga practice I share with my students gives me daily energy/life force/prana. Sharing yoga in a group always raises the energy/universal vibration in the Club. Overall, I find Northampton Athletic Club has very “clean” (healthy) clear energy. Come check it out some time. They have saunas!
Now that I am feeling fully provided for and have found the support I need within, I feel much lighter. My healing journey has really just begun. I learned a lot from my practitioners about lifestyle changes that I needed to make. I had no choice, but to walk my Truth in order to heal my breast. My breast has been speaking to me all along the way. The cancer has been a teacher in finding my way back to my pure essence…living my bliss, being healthy. And by being healthy, I mean feeling my cells alive and my energy high…thriving. Elena and Lenore’s nourishing cooking has helped tremendously in experiencing the healing gifts of food. I am also truly grateful to my teachers, Sylvia and Ariana and all my friends who offered sage advice around putting ME first…COMPLETELY loving Self. “Falling back into oneself” was a necessary step to come into the kind of self love that is needed to heal naturally.
I have had periods when life has been full, but a constant has been much alone time in a rural town this winter. Because I have limited energy to drive and visit others, I had no choice but to have “tea” with mySelf each and every day. I love to feel the bliss I feel when I am doing exactly what I love to do and what my body needs in each moment. It is pure ecstasy! My preference is to be in tribe, but I can also do this. I trust there is a lesson in it around being in tribe. When one is solid within oneself and unaffected by others, then one can be One with everything else. I felt that today on my walk. I felt the evenness…steadiness…of oneness…being neutral. My actions were not effecting anyone else. No one else was effecting me. I was at peace.
Always grateful to you for reading and for practicing the yoga.
Namaste.
Jai Ma!
Prana
www.pranaheals.com
Breast Cancer Update
For those who are concerned or curious, I will provide a brief health status update.
A year ago, I discover a marble sized breast lump. It has been a very stressful year and a half, which included three moves, two teaching location changes and an unsettled family environment. I can honestly say that I have done an excellent job changing my diet, exercising, self care, spiritual growth and getting the care I need. I received the best natural care in the Valley. However, cancer is cancer. It grows fast. A year later, the tumor is now 2 cm X 2 cm. Yoga teachers are famous for their small breasts, so this is a significant size for me.
I also grew tired of the daily awareness that every move I made or feeling I was having effected my breast and the size of the tumor. I was feeling held back from engaging fully in my life because of all the pressure to heal myself. I like to be out in the world enjoying life. I felt the need to take the pressure off and allow myself to have some sugar now and then, a glass of sake once in a while. To feel that I will be o.k. if I lose a few hours sleep here and there to stay up a little later.
As I hit this lifestyle maintenance wall, I decided to check in with my Oncologist.
She has been very supportive of my choices and took it upon herself to inquire about a “low impact” lumpectomy with local anesthesia and no radiation. She sent me to another surgeon for a second opinion who was also very supportive. I received the surgery yesterday at Cooley Dickinson Hospital. With prayers, support, a calming herbal tea and the medicine bhudda chant, I came through the procedure and am feeling pretty strong and only experiencing very minor pain.
Minimizing the chemicals (pain killers/anesthesia) in my body, prayer, choosing the right Dr., the 4 month detox lifestyle/diet and a week long vacation in Florida the week before the surgery must have all contributed to this surgery going much smoother than the previous. I also got to see an operating room and be awake during a surgery which most women do heavily sedated. It was scary, but also felt very empowering.
While in the hospital, it was difficult not to notice how much holistic health is missing from this health care setting. During the series of 6 mammograms necessary to locate the tumor, I could have really used a neck massage with some arnica. Instead, the radiologist stood in the space as we waited for the X Rays to develop, fumbling around nervously trying to spark up conversation to distract me. I chanted to myself and gazed at my beautiful medicine bhudda pendant through the discomfort of the neck pain and sore breast. It could have been so much more healing if she was willing to give a neck rub or offer something natural and healing for neck and the breast pain. Rescue remedy for the trauma. It also would have been beneficial to my healing and experience to be permitted to have a close friend or healer with me providing reiki, massage and natural remedies, holding my hand and chanting with me throughout the surgery.
The doctor and nurses did an excellent job. I accepted them as who they were, and in their own way, they all offered healing and love. They were all acting from their Highest Place for the Highest Good and were all performing at their Highest Potential. This was my prayer as I entered the surgery and it was how it turned out. There were moments when I felt held by the circle of women working on the surgery. It was a spiritual experience. As spiritual as we all felt comfortable being in front of each other. It was as if it was under the surface or instead, possibly the Universal Oneness of all of us practicing our own individual and collective spirituality and healing abilities. The medicine bhudda picture lying next to my head and my prayers and intentions may have created the vibe...safety and atmosphere for all to engage from their Highest place.
My husband, Rene, took the day off and we made an adventure of it. Staying in each moment fully and laughing most of the day. I felt good enough afterwards to get some plant medicine in the Smith College greenhouse by sitting in the tropical room and inhaling the fragrances and colors of the Bulb Show. What a great thing to do after day stay surgery.
I will know my pathology results in a few days. I began Iscador injections a month ago. I think this medicine is making me stronger as well. Iscador is a homeopathic remedy made from mistletoe. It has been studied for 15 years in Switzerland and is now commonly used as an alternative to radiation and chemo in Switzerland and Germany. Studies show that it is more effective. I will continue these injections and healthy living and monitor the cancer growth/presence with a mammogram in six to 12 months.
Thanks for your concern, thoughts, prayers and love. I am in good hands and feel stronger and healthier than ever.
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Healing Breast Cancer Naturally Update
Back from my one month healing retreat. I took a few weeks at home in MA and a few weeks in Boulder. I had moments of rest and healing , but mostly enjoyed the holidays and snow with family and community. It felt good to shift out of the detox mode for a while, feel my healed body and see what it is capable of. My digestion has REALLY improved after 10 months of strict dieting. I chose to dabble in some “off diet” foods with very little problems. I have been continuing treatments that promote detox and they allow me to feel into what my body desires, so it has also not been difficult to go back to a clean diet. I don’t have that big post holidays sugar addiction to deal with. Yay!
Some folks have expressed that they have questions about my condition, but don’t want to ask and possibly upset me. Let me try and provide a brief update. I recently sent out a wonderful article from the Chopra Center that sums up beautifully the “cancer walk”. See http://www.chopra.com/chopra/general/default.aspx?oid=126872
Overall, the healing process has been highly transformational experience. It has become clear to me that my lifestyle needs to dramatically shift to continue to heal the cancer and prevent a reoccurrence. I have had many physical and spiritual indications that the cancer is clearing, if not totally clear. However, when I miseat, I have experienced inflamed lymph in my chest and can feel the lump. When inflamed, the limp is larger than a quarter, flat and thick. Restaurant meat (hormones), sugar and alcohol have been big aggravators. I did have a few scares while trying some holiday foods and restaurant food in CO. Rest, yoga, hot tubbing, clay and essential oil applications brought my breast quickly into balance again…no palpable lump or swollen lymph.
I am finding that I really need to put my health ahead of everything else. I am watching my patterns to want to keep up with folks who have more energy and to partake in physically active past times like dancing and skiing. Some days are easier than others to shift my level of exercise and productivity to something more gentle and that fits my rhythm. I have had some amazing Earth plane angels/teachers show me how to enjoy life without being physically active. I am grateful to them (Sara, the other goddess in flannel PJs at the sensuality night, Jemma and others who have caught my eye as I observe how others live in their bodies with acceptance).
I am finding that exercise is also critical to my healing. My body gets oxygenated and that oxygen gives me energy and I feel healthier. If I do not exercise, I feel easily fatigued and have low energy. I also find that if I exercise too much, I cause a set back (extreme fatigue and illness). I had a bit of this in CO, trying to keep up with my athlete companions.
So I am continuing on to find a new balance in my life. I am getting closer to getting some reliable help around the house when Rene is working in CO. I found a wonderful women who is part of the meditation community and seems like an easeful fit. We'll see if that is meant to come together for me. I am noticing that there is a plan to all this...a divine order that I do not have much control over. We are all getting our lessons. Big lessons around "family" and support.
I start work on Sunday. I tried some yoga while on retreat and feel strong, but also a bit out of shape. Need to build my flexibility and strength up…or not. I am enjoying a new way of sharing the yoga. My meditation practice continues to deepen and is bringing amazing gifts of light, clarity and oneness to my life.
While in Boulder, I realized my need for connection, as Boulder is a high energy social place. Folks meet up every night of the week and go on adventures every weekend. At times I found this a bit exhausting, but in general I was fed by all the connecting. I am concerned that life is so quiet in MA right now. I hope to reach out to new communities to create more of a social network. I am also desiring to find a mellow crowd that is more into connecting as community with spiritual unity and play.
I was deeply touched by my yoga community in Boulder and miss that here in MA. My yoga community will be praying for my healing. I was given the medicine Buddha mantra by my guru, Baba Ji. He says that if I visualize the medicine buddha in my third eye, heart and nadis (meridians), I will experience deep personal healing.
I have shifted profoundly as a result of this dis-ease. I have learned much about myself and how I need to love myself more than ever. I have learned a great deal about family and community. It has been interesting to be in a position of only being able to receive and not give back for an indefinite period of time. However, over the years, I feel I have earned this privilege and can receive with grace and gratitude.
I feel I am in the groove with the Universe. The timing of things has been impeccable. I feel I can totally release into the support of my guides and know I will be held fully. I feel very tuned into what is best for me and am being patient with myself and others, as we all adjust to my new lifestyle.
I am grateful to all who have helped out. Thanks for reading and caring about me and my family.
For those who need details about my healing path, I will outline some specifics below…
I would l ike to preface by saying that there are so many healing options and I went with what my trusted practitioners recommended, my own research and what felt best for my body, mind and spirit.
My main healing path includes a detox/alkalarian diet, some natural supplements that kill cancer cells (I-C-3 and IP-6), acupuncture, shiatsu, clay applications to breast to remove toxins and essential oil breast massages (lavender and frankincense).
I applied poke root oil and a tumor clearing herbal salve for two weeks. The burning sensation and toxic rash became too much to tolerate, so I stopped. I am encouraged to reapply as need when lump flares up.
For stress redux, I have received a lot of reiki/energy work. I also meditate daily for about a half hour. I hope to increase this to an evening sit as well. I also do yoga as needed and walk or exercise almost daily. Oxygenating the body is important when one has cancer b/c cancer likes to live in an anaerobic environment. I also took a Chi Gong course, which was very balancing, but don’t really have a daily routine. I need to take more classes. I have also received a few biofeedback sessions and foot reflexology, which both promoted relaxation.
I am also taking a pile of supplements for digestion, pain (muscle, joints, migraines), stress, antioxidants and immune system boosters.
I am seriously considering Iscador, mistletoe injections, to ensure the cancer does not reoccur. I would need to give myself three injections per week for about a year. The research shows that Iscador keeps major tumors from growing and extends life more effectively than chemo or radiation. It has been used in Germany and Switzerland for many years and is covered by insurance there. I still need to consult with my MD as to which of the many options is the best course of extreme treatment. (Where to put my healing dollars).
I received two vitamin C IVs and they made me feel bad…acidic, kidney pain and tired, so I chose to stop that for now.
I also take pH drops and Super Greens daily.
I am also receiving regular spiritual counseling and energetic healing to manage all the emotional transformation and lifestyle changes taking place. For me, this has been the most important part of the healing journey...to look at what is not working in my life and to move into my Truth.
A JourneyDance weekend was very transformative, as well as the Womb and Belly Conference. It was so sweet spend the day healing with a group of women and to receive snake medicine. The ancient art of snake healing is very powerful. The snake helped to be able to ask and receive, which has been critical to my healing.
As for follow up and monitoring…that is a tough one. I have been reading some nasty stats on mammograms. Susan Weed’s Breast Health book states that one mammogram can double a 35 year old women’s chances of getting breast cancer. I have already had about 20 - 30 on my left breast. I may get an MRI soon, if I can get the Drs. to give me one and for insurance to cover it. They are not considered protocol and I am not following western med protocol anyway, so the insurance game gets a bit tricky. I will also be taking an estrogen test soon to see how my estrogen levels are doing. I am proestrogenic, which causes aggressive cancer growth. Hence, the need to stay away from meat (hormones).
Most of all, I am listening to my body. I know when it is healthy…not acidic and stressed. I can feel my breast and lymph glands respond to stress and inflammation due to acidic/inflammatory food, pollution and stress. If I feel healthy and strong, I would be surprised if I was dying, right? Kinda makes sense… My digestion has been doing REALLY well, so that is a good sign. Also, fatigue and pain levels are good indicators. I currently need daily household/driving support to keep that all in check. I am tuned in and asking for what I need, so no worries. If you are concerneded and want to contribute to my healing, say a prayer, visit, offer some support, send a card or CD.
I need connection and support to stay on this natural healing path and to be successful. I would like to fully experience that I can completely heal with personal introspection, transformation, gifts from the Earth, prayer and love. I would like to know that family and community are not just a concept in this country, but something that can heal. While living in CR, a few of my CR friends asked me with surprise on different occasions, “Prana, don’t you know that love can heal?” I looked at them dumb founded and said, "I don’t believe I have experienced that in my life or in the lives of my family and community." During this journey, I have felt deeply the love and support of others and see the power that this connection has on one’s healing. It is truly profound.
Since I have been doing the “cancer walk” for about 3 months now, many people in my life are showing signs, and family members have actually right out expressed to me, that they want life back to normal. Many have denied there is even a problem or that I have need for help. I am doing my best to understand that this can be a difficult/ackward journey for many. Very few people recognize the gifts that come when one helps another. I am doing my best to forgive and understand all that. Several have encouraged the surgery/radiation route b/c they are concerned about my choices and others want me to get this over with and not need so much support. I will try and explain below why I will not go that route…
1. I have a weak system and am very sensitive to chemicals. When I have an exposure or experience shock or trauma in my body, my body crashes. I am unable to function and need long term deep healing and care. Back to square one. All the money, time and healing gone to waste. My body was extremely weakened by the biopsy procedure and pain killers. This was a clear sign that another surgery and radiation treatment would only weaken my body further vs. “cure” me.
2. The biopsy procedure activated past life trauma of being tortured as a witch. It felt in no way nurturing or healing. The trauma and discomfort were challenging to bare. My breast was squeezed in a metal vice grip for about an hour, receiving continuous mammograms, while being probed with a core boring surgical needle. Following the surgery, I was brought into the mammogram room and several more mammograms were taken after my breast was freshly cut. The radiologist and nurses were very kind, but that’s about the only good thing I can say about the whole procedure. It felt "primitive" (lacking in holistic philosophy), disconnected and toxic and that was “just” the biopsy.
3. In my opinion, surgery and radiation (the protocol for my condition) are a quick fix. We get cancer b/c the body is out of balance. If we get the body back into balance, the cancer can not live in a healthy environment. A tumor is a ball of toxic material that the body has isolated to be eliminated. Elimination can take place with natural treatments…the tumor can be dissolved or come right out of the skin. I experienced this with my first lump (using diet, warm castor oil massages and essential oils) that I had this past spring and the lump that grew after the biopsy (using detox diet, poke root oil and tumor clearing salve). It does not need to be cut out in a hospital room under sedation. If we do not address the core body/health imbalance issues, cancer WILL reoccur. There is no doubt in my mind. Healing the whole body takes time. It took years of chemical exposures and body abuse to cause the cancer and it will take time, resources and support to get my body back into balance. I am committed to this path.
4. The natural path feels so much more in line with who I am and what my body desires. It has been so fun to use natural remedies from the local area. There is a deep spiritual and primal connection with the Earth and one’s body that takes place when one consciously uses the Earth to heal. I have no fear that I will not survive this. If for some reason, my destiny is different and life does not allow me to heal due to lack of resources and support, then I surrender to this outcome. I see the bigger picture and all it’s lessons. I trust that if I do my best I can on my end and live my Truth, then I will be content with any outcome. I understand that this is a difficult concept for our culture to grasp at this time in our evolution and that this outward resistance may hinder my healing process. I am not sure one can heal naturally without consistent community and family support. However, I do know of two living examples right here in the Valley. That is encouraging.
We’ll see how it goes…
I am open to what is.
Hum Sah (I am that)
Much love and gratitude.
Prana
Back from my one month healing retreat. I took a few weeks at home in MA and a few weeks in Boulder. I had moments of rest and healing , but mostly enjoyed the holidays and snow with family and community. It felt good to shift out of the detox mode for a while, feel my healed body and see what it is capable of. My digestion has REALLY improved after 10 months of strict dieting. I chose to dabble in some “off diet” foods with very little problems. I have been continuing treatments that promote detox and they allow me to feel into what my body desires, so it has also not been difficult to go back to a clean diet. I don’t have that big post holidays sugar addiction to deal with. Yay!
Some folks have expressed that they have questions about my condition, but don’t want to ask and possibly upset me. Let me try and provide a brief update. I recently sent out a wonderful article from the Chopra Center that sums up beautifully the “cancer walk”. See http://www.chopra.com/chopra/general/default.aspx?oid=126872
Overall, the healing process has been highly transformational experience. It has become clear to me that my lifestyle needs to dramatically shift to continue to heal the cancer and prevent a reoccurrence. I have had many physical and spiritual indications that the cancer is clearing, if not totally clear. However, when I miseat, I have experienced inflamed lymph in my chest and can feel the lump. When inflamed, the limp is larger than a quarter, flat and thick. Restaurant meat (hormones), sugar and alcohol have been big aggravators. I did have a few scares while trying some holiday foods and restaurant food in CO. Rest, yoga, hot tubbing, clay and essential oil applications brought my breast quickly into balance again…no palpable lump or swollen lymph.
I am finding that I really need to put my health ahead of everything else. I am watching my patterns to want to keep up with folks who have more energy and to partake in physically active past times like dancing and skiing. Some days are easier than others to shift my level of exercise and productivity to something more gentle and that fits my rhythm. I have had some amazing Earth plane angels/teachers show me how to enjoy life without being physically active. I am grateful to them (Sara, the other goddess in flannel PJs at the sensuality night, Jemma and others who have caught my eye as I observe how others live in their bodies with acceptance).
I am finding that exercise is also critical to my healing. My body gets oxygenated and that oxygen gives me energy and I feel healthier. If I do not exercise, I feel easily fatigued and have low energy. I also find that if I exercise too much, I cause a set back (extreme fatigue and illness). I had a bit of this in CO, trying to keep up with my athlete companions.
So I am continuing on to find a new balance in my life. I am getting closer to getting some reliable help around the house when Rene is working in CO. I found a wonderful women who is part of the meditation community and seems like an easeful fit. We'll see if that is meant to come together for me. I am noticing that there is a plan to all this...a divine order that I do not have much control over. We are all getting our lessons. Big lessons around "family" and support.
I start work on Sunday. I tried some yoga while on retreat and feel strong, but also a bit out of shape. Need to build my flexibility and strength up…or not. I am enjoying a new way of sharing the yoga. My meditation practice continues to deepen and is bringing amazing gifts of light, clarity and oneness to my life.
While in Boulder, I realized my need for connection, as Boulder is a high energy social place. Folks meet up every night of the week and go on adventures every weekend. At times I found this a bit exhausting, but in general I was fed by all the connecting. I am concerned that life is so quiet in MA right now. I hope to reach out to new communities to create more of a social network. I am also desiring to find a mellow crowd that is more into connecting as community with spiritual unity and play.
I was deeply touched by my yoga community in Boulder and miss that here in MA. My yoga community will be praying for my healing. I was given the medicine Buddha mantra by my guru, Baba Ji. He says that if I visualize the medicine buddha in my third eye, heart and nadis (meridians), I will experience deep personal healing.
I have shifted profoundly as a result of this dis-ease. I have learned much about myself and how I need to love myself more than ever. I have learned a great deal about family and community. It has been interesting to be in a position of only being able to receive and not give back for an indefinite period of time. However, over the years, I feel I have earned this privilege and can receive with grace and gratitude.
I feel I am in the groove with the Universe. The timing of things has been impeccable. I feel I can totally release into the support of my guides and know I will be held fully. I feel very tuned into what is best for me and am being patient with myself and others, as we all adjust to my new lifestyle.
I am grateful to all who have helped out. Thanks for reading and caring about me and my family.
For those who need details about my healing path, I will outline some specifics below…
I would l ike to preface by saying that there are so many healing options and I went with what my trusted practitioners recommended, my own research and what felt best for my body, mind and spirit.
My main healing path includes a detox/alkalarian diet, some natural supplements that kill cancer cells (I-C-3 and IP-6), acupuncture, shiatsu, clay applications to breast to remove toxins and essential oil breast massages (lavender and frankincense).
I applied poke root oil and a tumor clearing herbal salve for two weeks. The burning sensation and toxic rash became too much to tolerate, so I stopped. I am encouraged to reapply as need when lump flares up.
For stress redux, I have received a lot of reiki/energy work. I also meditate daily for about a half hour. I hope to increase this to an evening sit as well. I also do yoga as needed and walk or exercise almost daily. Oxygenating the body is important when one has cancer b/c cancer likes to live in an anaerobic environment. I also took a Chi Gong course, which was very balancing, but don’t really have a daily routine. I need to take more classes. I have also received a few biofeedback sessions and foot reflexology, which both promoted relaxation.
I am also taking a pile of supplements for digestion, pain (muscle, joints, migraines), stress, antioxidants and immune system boosters.
I am seriously considering Iscador, mistletoe injections, to ensure the cancer does not reoccur. I would need to give myself three injections per week for about a year. The research shows that Iscador keeps major tumors from growing and extends life more effectively than chemo or radiation. It has been used in Germany and Switzerland for many years and is covered by insurance there. I still need to consult with my MD as to which of the many options is the best course of extreme treatment. (Where to put my healing dollars).
I received two vitamin C IVs and they made me feel bad…acidic, kidney pain and tired, so I chose to stop that for now.
I also take pH drops and Super Greens daily.
I am also receiving regular spiritual counseling and energetic healing to manage all the emotional transformation and lifestyle changes taking place. For me, this has been the most important part of the healing journey...to look at what is not working in my life and to move into my Truth.
A JourneyDance weekend was very transformative, as well as the Womb and Belly Conference. It was so sweet spend the day healing with a group of women and to receive snake medicine. The ancient art of snake healing is very powerful. The snake helped to be able to ask and receive, which has been critical to my healing.
As for follow up and monitoring…that is a tough one. I have been reading some nasty stats on mammograms. Susan Weed’s Breast Health book states that one mammogram can double a 35 year old women’s chances of getting breast cancer. I have already had about 20 - 30 on my left breast. I may get an MRI soon, if I can get the Drs. to give me one and for insurance to cover it. They are not considered protocol and I am not following western med protocol anyway, so the insurance game gets a bit tricky. I will also be taking an estrogen test soon to see how my estrogen levels are doing. I am proestrogenic, which causes aggressive cancer growth. Hence, the need to stay away from meat (hormones).
Most of all, I am listening to my body. I know when it is healthy…not acidic and stressed. I can feel my breast and lymph glands respond to stress and inflammation due to acidic/inflammatory food, pollution and stress. If I feel healthy and strong, I would be surprised if I was dying, right? Kinda makes sense… My digestion has been doing REALLY well, so that is a good sign. Also, fatigue and pain levels are good indicators. I currently need daily household/driving support to keep that all in check. I am tuned in and asking for what I need, so no worries. If you are concerneded and want to contribute to my healing, say a prayer, visit, offer some support, send a card or CD.
I need connection and support to stay on this natural healing path and to be successful. I would like to fully experience that I can completely heal with personal introspection, transformation, gifts from the Earth, prayer and love. I would like to know that family and community are not just a concept in this country, but something that can heal. While living in CR, a few of my CR friends asked me with surprise on different occasions, “Prana, don’t you know that love can heal?” I looked at them dumb founded and said, "I don’t believe I have experienced that in my life or in the lives of my family and community." During this journey, I have felt deeply the love and support of others and see the power that this connection has on one’s healing. It is truly profound.
Since I have been doing the “cancer walk” for about 3 months now, many people in my life are showing signs, and family members have actually right out expressed to me, that they want life back to normal. Many have denied there is even a problem or that I have need for help. I am doing my best to understand that this can be a difficult/ackward journey for many. Very few people recognize the gifts that come when one helps another. I am doing my best to forgive and understand all that. Several have encouraged the surgery/radiation route b/c they are concerned about my choices and others want me to get this over with and not need so much support. I will try and explain below why I will not go that route…
1. I have a weak system and am very sensitive to chemicals. When I have an exposure or experience shock or trauma in my body, my body crashes. I am unable to function and need long term deep healing and care. Back to square one. All the money, time and healing gone to waste. My body was extremely weakened by the biopsy procedure and pain killers. This was a clear sign that another surgery and radiation treatment would only weaken my body further vs. “cure” me.
2. The biopsy procedure activated past life trauma of being tortured as a witch. It felt in no way nurturing or healing. The trauma and discomfort were challenging to bare. My breast was squeezed in a metal vice grip for about an hour, receiving continuous mammograms, while being probed with a core boring surgical needle. Following the surgery, I was brought into the mammogram room and several more mammograms were taken after my breast was freshly cut. The radiologist and nurses were very kind, but that’s about the only good thing I can say about the whole procedure. It felt "primitive" (lacking in holistic philosophy), disconnected and toxic and that was “just” the biopsy.
3. In my opinion, surgery and radiation (the protocol for my condition) are a quick fix. We get cancer b/c the body is out of balance. If we get the body back into balance, the cancer can not live in a healthy environment. A tumor is a ball of toxic material that the body has isolated to be eliminated. Elimination can take place with natural treatments…the tumor can be dissolved or come right out of the skin. I experienced this with my first lump (using diet, warm castor oil massages and essential oils) that I had this past spring and the lump that grew after the biopsy (using detox diet, poke root oil and tumor clearing salve). It does not need to be cut out in a hospital room under sedation. If we do not address the core body/health imbalance issues, cancer WILL reoccur. There is no doubt in my mind. Healing the whole body takes time. It took years of chemical exposures and body abuse to cause the cancer and it will take time, resources and support to get my body back into balance. I am committed to this path.
4. The natural path feels so much more in line with who I am and what my body desires. It has been so fun to use natural remedies from the local area. There is a deep spiritual and primal connection with the Earth and one’s body that takes place when one consciously uses the Earth to heal. I have no fear that I will not survive this. If for some reason, my destiny is different and life does not allow me to heal due to lack of resources and support, then I surrender to this outcome. I see the bigger picture and all it’s lessons. I trust that if I do my best I can on my end and live my Truth, then I will be content with any outcome. I understand that this is a difficult concept for our culture to grasp at this time in our evolution and that this outward resistance may hinder my healing process. I am not sure one can heal naturally without consistent community and family support. However, I do know of two living examples right here in the Valley. That is encouraging.
We’ll see how it goes…
I am open to what is.
Hum Sah (I am that)
Much love and gratitude.
Prana
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